The Onion, "Monk Gloats Over Yoga Championship:" "'I am the serenest!' Bikram shouted to the estimated crowd of 20,000 yoga fans, vigorously pumping his fists... Bikram averaged 1.89 breaths a minute during the two-hour competition, nearly .3 fewer than his nearest competitor, second-place finisher and two-time champion Sri Salil 'The Hammer' Gupta."
[via SteveD]